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Awakening

Blindsided By Presence

WOOOOOOAH!

IT CAME ABSOLUTELY OUT OF NOWHERE!

Nirvana!

For those who are not familiar with the term Nirvana, it is the final goal in Buddhism. I am not, and do not consider myself in the least bit a “Buddhist” according to the traditional term and meaning.


However, I know that when Nirvana came over me, there was absolutely NO QUESTION, what Nirvana is and how it feels.

Here are some synonyms or words that mean the same thing.

Prior that feeling, my interest was devoted religiously to becoming the best person I could possibly be. I dedicated myself to every Personal Growth/Development and Self-Help book I could get my hands on.

At the age of 19 when I read my first Personal Growth book, I felt that everything in that book was precisely what I needed to hear at that time.

As I continued to study Personal & Development, I had questioned myself why it had not been THE Focal point of the education systems.

So I decided to dedicated myself to building a brand to see to it, that the world would make their primary focus on dedicating to Self-help material, just as I had!

I felt that it was the key to universe, that all my hopes and dreams of watching the world get better while also becoming financially rich in the process.

UNTIL….

That was until I had reached Nirvana, or perfect bliss when I knew that, absolute infinite peace was what I truly wanted.

It later also occurred to me that, Personal growth and development has essentially already been happening from the beginning of the human race.

As human beings we are naturally seeking to grow in a way that prolongs our lifespan on this planet, as well as to procreate.

Personal Growth is in a nutshell that there is something potentially either wrong in this moment with me that can improve, or that there is a strength that I can take to the next level.

Both require the past, the present and the future or linear time. Before now, now and after now is another way to think of linear time.

Where I was, where I am and where I want to be regarding ANY aspect that’s measured by the human mind.

In fact, the human mind can only measure where I was, where I am and a projection of where I will be, this is the human mechanism for survival.

However, there is something that does not require linear time as we understand it in the LEAST sense.

And that is a Spiritual Awakening. Rather than point blank tell you what a Spiritual Awakening is, I’m going give 3 metaphors that drive home the point that Spiritual Awakening is not linear, and CANNOT require time.

#1. Blind side offensive tackle

What?


How could football possibly relate to a Spiritual Awakening?

Well for starters, everything is in relation to the next thing and nothing is left out.

Secondly here is how….

My first love and passion was football, played all the way back to the 5th grade starting in Pop Warner.

Any who…

In traditional terms on the offensive line which is what protects quarterback you have the left tackle and the right tackle which are the two offensive linemen on outside of the offensive line.

This how it looks, from left to right.

Left Tackle, Left Guard, Center, Right Guard, Right Tackle.

However, it goes deeper than that.

One of the Left tackle or the right tackle acts as a “Blindside” tackle. What does this mean?

It means that depending on which hand the quarterback throws with, the opposite tackle will be his Blindside tackle.

The reason why is when the quarter hikes the ball he will do his drop back, and NOT be able to see behind him, hence the blindside.

So if he is a right handed quarterback then his left tackle will be his blindside and if he is a left handed quarterback then his right tackle will be his blindside tackle.

This means that if a right handed quarterback hikes the ball, and the left defensive end gets around the left tackle and hits the quarterback he will have had NO idea that he was about to get hit.

Obviously QB’s are ready to get hit regardless, its that if they will not always be able to see where it’s coming from.

As an ex quarterback, it’s one thing to get tackled, it’s a WHOLE other ballgame to get tackled hard when you have no idea that it’s coming.

How does this apply to awakening.

Consider that your blind side is that you take yourself to be the thinking-mind, and that you are trapped in thought as a result.

And then BOOM! And out of nowhere!

You woke up, OUT of the identification with the thought, and suddenly you were the witness of your thoughts, BLINDSIDED by PRESENCE.

Accept rather than getting tackled by a Football player, you have awakened to presence.

#2. Blindside Mirror

The first car wreck I got into was a few months after I started driving for the first time, and the reason was, I thought that I could trust my blindside mirror COMPLETELY.

What I did not realize is that when a car is coming up into your next lane, there is a split second where the blindside Mirror does not capture that car.

Well, long story short, WHAM!

I hit them. Luckily it wasn’t too bad for neither of us, accept for my monthly insurance bill. -_-

The point is, just as with that blindside mirror, you cannot trust EVERYTHING you think. In fact, perhaps a lot less than you can possibly imagine.

Thinking is born out of what you think you know from the past, but because the present moment is forever new, forever fresh and alive that when the thoughts come to a complete stop and you see that which does not change (you), then WHAM, blindsided yet again by presence.

#3. Excerpt from “What’s wrong with right now, unless you think about it.” – Sailor Bob Adamson

“It will dawn on you. Just like when you walk out of the house and you get a mile down the road and it dawns on you that you have left the keys at home. It will just dawn on you. Why did you leave your keys at home? Just a little bit of inattentiveness to what is, at the time. It will just dawn on you.”

When you suddenly recognized that you forgot something, how long did it take to hit you? No time it all, it hit you all of the sudden.

Now let’s take that excerpt a bit further. Let’s say your daily routine is to leave your house and go for a walk for two miles a day every day.

You have been doing this now for 3 years straight, it’s automatic. It’s also automatic that you bring your keys you. But one day, for whatever reason you leave your keys at home.

While you’re walking, something doesn’t quite seem right, something feels off, but you’re not quite sure what it is.

You feel a bit uncomfortable for some reason, because you can’t wrap your head around that feeling.

That’s what it was, you forgot your keys.

And then you continue to walk, and the completely out of nowhere, OH!

And suddenly you were released from that underlying agitation of feeling that something was off.

That’s no different than a spontaneous awakening.

Until you have awakened, instantly, suddenly out of the false thought-created sense of self, there will be a little bit of agitation in the back ground of all of your experience, but you won’t be able to wrap your head around it, because you cannot. Perfectly perfect that you cannot by the way.

Let’s rewind firstly though.

What do the three metaphors all have him common?

That in all 3 scenarios, you did NOT see it coming. The QB could not see behind him, thus he did not see the tackle coming.

The driver (me in this case) relied too heavily on the blind side mirror, and could not see this coming.

And lastly, you originally did not know when you left your house you forgot your keys, so when you remembered, you did not see that coming.

A spontaneous awakening, just I had when Nirvana HIT me, I did NOT in my WILDEST DREAMS & IMAGINATION, see that coming.

It’s because presence was FAR too simple to notice, thus the thinking-mind had overlooked it. (Usually in the search for pleasure or away from pain)

The thing about Nirvana however is that, it’s less important than the actual liberation of breaking free from the false identification of the mind.

When you forgot your keys from home and felt comfortable because you had been so used to grabbing them, that you knew something was missing but you couldn’t grasp why, UNTIL it dawned you.

This is the same in a lot of your experiences, there will be this sense of agitation, this sense that something is missing until it dawns on you that you are not the thinking-mind.

Why?

The thinking-mind itself is the search. The thinking-mind can only understand the world experience in regards to going towards pleasure, or moving away from pain.

The thinking-mind calls pleasure to the feeling of being happy, or satisfied or content. And in the external world there is nothing but pleasure and pain.

The reason why the external world is nothing but pleasure and pain is because of the transistorizes of ALL experience.

EVERYTHING is coming and going. As you read these words, things are changing. Not a single thing will be exactly the same with each passing letter of these words.

Which is why pleasure does not equal peace which is what every human being is looking for. 

What the thinking-mind does not understand truly is the deepest essence of peace. The mind can only understand what it means to search. Even the search for truth, because the truth is already here, thus the ending of the search.

Absolute peace is your natural state, and it’s a result of knowing who you are, prior to a single thought, thus no thought at all.

So rather than thinking that you can use the mind just as you would to figure out the answer to a math problem, increase your IQ or develop yourself, this is actually about completely quitting the use of your mind for once, right now.

“USE YOUR MIND”, that’s what you will be told in life if you’re not doing the “right” thing.

Meanwhile the greatest human experience happens right here and right now, when the mind finally stops, completely for just now, without grasping or understanding anything.

Awakening is timeless, and when I say it happens out of nowhere, what I mean is, it happens now-here.

Not the present moment that the mind can think about. Not the now (awakening), that the mind can contemplate, anticipate, expect or hope for. BUT the now, that already “is”, YOUR natural state on a deep cellular level.

The light that dawns on you, is the LIGHT that is you, and that light is infinitely free, infinitely vast, infinitely ungraspable, but infinitely and eternally KNOWN.

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Matthew Scott Donnelly

Matthew Scott Donnelly was born and raised in Indiana. At the age of 24 he decided that he had not manifest a life that he was happy with, and decided to dedicate his heart and soul to Personal Growth and Development material. Roughly about one year later at the age of 25 he went from basic personal growth teachings to the a deeper realm into spirituality. Matthew is now 27 and his main focus is to continue on the path of awakening, and utilize his Facebook marketing skills to spread Spiritual and Consciousness related material to the rest of the world. You can follow Matthew and his work down below.

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