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Awakening

Her Dreams FINALLY Came True! But….

Once lived a girl, named fiction character named Brittany.

It was safe to that at 16-year-old sophomore in high school Brittany had a rough life.

Brittany didn’t have very many friends, always looked up to the popular kids, to the kids with a lot of money, to the jocks, cheerleaders, and wondered to herself why she had to be born with the current life that she had.

Brittany had a lot of anger built up inside, a lot of resentment and envy towards anyone she perceived as having something that she did not possess in her life.

There was ALWAYS this constant agitation going on inside of her.

And if that wasn’t enough her family did not respect her, and was always constantly nagging her about the things she was doing, saying and thinking.

It was practically as if, her own family was bullying her.

All the way through high school it was like this, and she hated the world. And she constantly was having thoughts of depression, suicide, and generally felt that the world was just hell.

Then one day!

Something interesting came into her life.


It was a book. A motivational book, that just decided to pick up one day, because…well why not?

This book taught her that things didn’t currently have to be the way that they were, and that she could be financially wealthy, and that she could have EVERYTHING in her life if she just had the desire and passion to get it.

She then grew a fiery passion to get every motivational book she could get her hands on.

Book after book, her desire, the fire to achieve in her grew deeper and deeper.

She decided that all the buildup in her from being bullied, from not having many friends, from being picked on by her family was going to be the fuel that set on her on fire towards her dreams of being successful.

So what she decided to do was to create a dream board.

A dream board is a white board, similar to those boards on Pinterest, that you pin picture too, accept this is a white board you put up on your wall with pictures of all the greatest things you can possibly imagine that you want to achieve.

She put everything from…

  • The most expensive cars in the world. (Bugatti, Lamborghini, ect)
  • To own the expensive mansions in the world.
  • To stay in the most luxurious hotels in the world.
  • To visit every country in the world.

Not only did she create a dream board, but she created the Good ol Bucket list and her goal for that list was to do everything she could possibly do in the world before she hit the bucket. (Casket)

By creating these things and looking at them every day, it would ENSURE that she would put action to move towards her dreams every day.

So she decided that the quickest route that was going to do to get her there was Real Estate.

She was going to buy homes, put work into them and resale them for more than what she bought the home for, and her investment.

Real Estate is said to have created the most millionaires in the world, so it was a no brainer.

She bought dozens of books, to learn the ins and outs of how to do Real Estate successfully.

And right out of high school for the next 10-years, she grinded, she grinded for 8, 10, 12, 14 hours’ days, sometimes without even taking a weekend off.

She let go of the previous few friends that she had, rarely attended family events and never went out for extracurricular activities.

The only thing on her mind was, “nothing is going to stop me, from my dreams/bucket list”.

She went through the struggles of learning, and losing a LOT of money over those years.

Depression, anxiety, stress, overwhelm, tension was the normal for her because she couldn’t wait to get to those dreams, and the setbacks were soul crushing.

And then finally during year ten of the journey, during one random day.

WHAM! WOAH! OMG!

She just sold her first house for $1,000,000!!!

She was so ecstatic! She knew that if she just kept going, that there was no way she couldn’t do this again!

So she did. She kept going from that day forward.

$1,000,000 wasn’t enough to fill what she had to feel all the way through high school, and even into her twenties when her family told her that her dreams were too far out of reach.

Nope, she was out to prove to the world that she was someone who needed to be respected, that she was someone who was worthy for the love and attention she wasn’t getting from anyone.

And AGAIN!

5 years later she was selling several multi million dollar homes per month!

And how did her lifestyle look at that point?

She looked up one day, and thought to herself. “I MADE IT!”

15 years of long grinding, she was now only 33 years young and one of richest people in the word!

She had EVERYTHING she set her eyes on.

She had the mansions, the cars, a jet airplane, she could go anywhere in the world that she wanted and do anything that she wanted.

She was DONE! It had felt like in that instant of knowing she had made it, had become as successful as she KNEW she would become that everything she had ever been through finally felt was released!

Ahhhhhh!

She was floating across the world in a daze of joy!

She began to have a bunch of friends, she was considered popular across Facebook, Instagram, Snapchat, you name it!

All the likes, the comments, the shares, the notoriety, the speaking engagements, the podcast interviews, invited the hottest parties across the globe, she had it all!

She was on a rollercoaster high.

That was until….

As the months went by until she had, had her epiphany of making it, of being successful, there was something inside her that seemed off.

Something didn’t still seem quite right, but she wasn’t quite sure what it was.

More months went by, and the sense of agitation continued to grow, until again depression, anxiety, stress and tension came over her again!

“WHY!?”

She thought.

“AFTER 15 YEARS OF GRINDING ACHIEVING EVERYTHING I WANTED WHY AM I DEPRESSED?”

Maybe it was the house. So she sold her house, and bought a new mansion.

In came a new sense of relief. And again…

Month passed by and the same. Again the sense of lacking something came.

Maybe it was the cars!?

Maybe she hadn’t done everything she wanted!?

Maybe her friends weren’t quite right?

She continuously changed things, but everything always seemed to just give her temporary relief but no matter what the constant agitation always seem to come back.

Then one day, she decided to give a spirituality a try. She had only herd glimpses of it from people here and there, but she did not know truly what it was. So she decided to see what it was truly all about.

She went to a teleseminar for spirituality. The things that were discussed were quite shocking to her.

#1. External Validation

This seems to be floating around the spirituality scene but it’s not really clear what it internal means either.

External validation means that you look to the ‘outside’ for your validation, for your sense of security.

And that’s exactly what Brittany was doing and she knew it.

So what truly is looking within mean?

What does it truly mean going internal mean?

Is this religious belief?

Is it a belief at all?

#2. Looking within

At the teleseminar it was discussed about an old ancient Indian Sage by the name of Ramana Maharshi.

And the big flat screen, on the projector was a direct quote from Ramana Maharshi.

“WHO AM I?”

And the first thing that entered Brittany’s mind was.

“Of course I know who I am. I’m Brittany, what kind of question is that!?”

And instantly, just after that the speaker said.

“Almost every human being on the planet earth, would instantly assume, that they are the name/body that they were born with. For those of you who are going through irritation, agitation, stress and anxiety, this is SUPER IMPORTANT so listen up.”

Instantly this got Brittany intrigued because she had, had a major breakdown on the way to the teleseminar.

The speaker continued…

“You have been gypped, lied to and if you take yourself to be the voice (thoughts) in your head, then every day of your lives is an April Fool’s joke. Taking yourself to be the voice in your head, is the PRIMARY reason why you have stress in your life.”

“WOAH! What!? HUH!?”

Brittany couldn’t believe her ears.

“So who if I am not the thoughts that come and go than am I then?”

She wondered.

And wham, almost directly after that voice in her head came and passed.

“YOU! Are the one who witnesses the mind.”

The speaker shouted!

#3. The Now

Everyone took a break, had lunch and reentered their seats.

The speaker continued.

“If you have been taking yourself to be the thoughts in your mind, then that means you have yet to be TRULY, FULLY, aware of the Now!

Aware of the present moment, and UNTIL you become truly, and fully aware of the now, will you have a true sense of fulfillment in your life.

You will be constantly seeing the present moment as a threat to your past experiences that make you who you think you are, and your future ambitions, who will make you become more than what you currently are.

You will see the present moment ONLY as a stepping stone to get to the next moment, in the hopes that somewhere in your future experiences will be FREEDOM.”

Hearing this wasn’t the greatest feeling in the world for Brittany. She felt like she just has a dump truck land on her in an instant. She felt drained of energy, like her whole life was suddenly seen to be a falsity. But somewhere inside, was a bit of release through that chaos.

Up on the screen again appeared a quote.

“Looking within is not a direction, it is a dimension.” – Sadhguru

The speak decided enough was enough, it was time to lay it all out on the line.

So he brought Brittany up to the stage. He asked her to spill her guts in front of the audience of thousands of people and open up about her struggles in life. She told him everything dating back to high school until the current moment, and balled her eyes out in front of every one.

He gave her a big hug and said

“Guess what!?

“You’re already free! The reason you built all of that anger, resentment, and hostility towards the world in high school was because you didn’t know who you truly were.

And as a result of thinking that you are the thoughts in your head, self-image, the name you were given, the present moment in its purest, naturalist, unconditioned, unaffected state was not available to you.

And well, contradictorily it was available to you, and always is, but you hadn’t realized that.

But because the present moment is eternally here, now, and eternally free from ALL External situations, not only are you hear already, but now you can begin to be aware of the present moment, beginning and ending now, and knowing this moment is your ONE TRUE HOME.

Your one true home, this sense of presence through your body that is never lacking, never needing, never desiring, never feeling incomplete, and without irritation and tension.

This moment is your resting place, as the weightless observer that I am.

This moment is from where you observe your thoughts, the gap in between your thoughts, thoughtless awareness as who you are in the absolute sense and finally for once in your life being free.

The truth is, not ONE experience that you went through was unnecessary because it happened just the way it was intended for you to end up in the spot on this stage you’re currently in, to hear this message.

The reason you felt the need to purchase all those things that you did, and continued HARD looking for external validation was because you had been taught by the world that it would give you what you were TRULY looking for. And what you truly looking for, is the state of being.

It was because of all the tension that had built up inside of you over the years AS A RESULT of knowing who you are, where you are which are both one with the now, the space of being.

It was never the situation that made you have all that stress and anxiety; it was you taking yourself to be your thoughts.”

So Brittany asked him a question as she wiped away her tears.

“So you mean I never no longer have to go through emotional pain again?”

“Absolutely you will continue to have painful experiences moving forward. Just because you know who you are now, does not mean that you won’t sometimes forget.

Just because you are always one with the now, and awareness of the now is available to you KNOW MATTER what situation is happening, does not mean you will always realize this, and that’s perfectly fine.

Because the emotional pain isn’t bad anyways, it is absolutely necessary for you as the bridge to wake you up out of the mind identification. Or the story that the voice in your head keeps creating.”

“Your expectation of something unique and dramatic, of some wonderful explosion, is merely hindering and delaying your Self Realization. You are not to expect an explosion, for the explosion has already happened – at the moment when you were born, when you realized yourself as Being-Knowing-Feeling. – Nisargadatta Maharaj

Brittany’s next question was….

“What should I do with my house, my cars, my dreams.”

“CONTINUE TO ENJOY the hell out of them. Go buy another mansion if you want, another Lamborghini if you would like, see the world, do what gives you pleasure. Just don’t need anything external from them to give you the lasting joy that presence can give you.

A lot of people ask the question.

Can money buy happiness?

And the reason this question is completely backwards is for one. There is no real concrete definition as to what happiness even is.

So what we are searching for something, that doesn’t even really exist.

Existence must be concrete, not subjective, opinionated or based on perception in the least bit. And the one constant, the one reality no matter how you look at life, or how your brain is wired, is presence.

Existence is.

What every human being is looking for is freedom, which….is.  

So the real question should be…

Can money buy you freedom?

And a lot of people would say of course it can. It can buy you food, water, to keep you surviving, give you more time to do the things you love.

However, I’m talking about a freedom that when the basic life necessities are taken care of, a deeper to the core freedom.

The freedom that is entirely non subjective.

But then again!

That question is still external.

What it should say…

Is…

Can the WORLD bring you freedom?

The world in regards to what?

One might ask.

In regards to human experience.

And the answer is….

No it cannot.

The reason why it cannot be, is because ALL human experience is fleeting.

Not one experience that you have ever had, no matter how pleasurable it was, remained here.

Which is why no matter what house you bought, no matter what car, or form of external validation you were looking for was giving you what you truly wanted for long.

The truth is though being that the world cannot bring you buy you unhappiness either.

In some extreme situations, you will not have any choices period but to suffer, but in almost 99% of your situations the world isn’t causing you emotional pain, it’s your false attachment to your identity.

And now, when you don’t NEED anything from the world to make you free, it becomes significantly more fun.

Now you can enjoy going after your dreams more, becoming that successful entrepreneur and whatever it is you would like to achieve in this world, just for the sake of experiencing this world to an amazing degree.

With this being said however….

The deeper one’s awareness of the now deepens through the body, without needing or wanting anything from it, the deeper your joy of this thoughtless moment will be realized to be beyond anyone’s WILDEST IMAGINATION.

There truly is joy inside of you right now, that when accessed on the deepest level, that no experience in this world on an external level can even come remotely close than being truly free from psychological time.

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Matthew Scott Donnelly

Matthew Scott Donnelly was born and raised in Indiana. At the age of 24 he decided that he had not manifest a life that he was happy with, and decided to dedicate his heart and soul to Personal Growth and Development material. Roughly about one year later at the age of 25 he went from basic personal growth teachings to the a deeper realm into spirituality. Matthew is now 27 and his main focus is to continue on the path of awakening, and utilize his Facebook marketing skills to spread Spiritual and Consciousness related material to the rest of the world. You can follow Matthew and his work down below.

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